Legislative priorities
Interpreters and lawyers for indigent persons facing deportation

     In a criminal case, the courts have ruled, you are entitled to a public defender if you cannot afford a lawyer, and you can have an interpreter if you or a witness needs one. However, deportation cases are technically civil cases, and SCOTUS has ruled that no such right exists in deportation cases. That means Congress needs to pass laws appropriating funds for the lawyers and interpreters.

A statute of limitations on naturalizations

     It is the proudest day of your life. You get sworn in as a United States citizen. Years later, you marry a sweetheart and bring them to the U.S.A. Maybe you cannot make a baby, so you adopt one from abroad. The baby grows up and marries a sweetheart, and brings them to the U.S.A.

     There’s just one problem: You were required to list all organizations of which you have ever been a member. When you signed up to get National Geographic, you became a member of the Society. You failed to list that. Your naturalization petition was defective. Your naturalization was invalid. Your spouse got permanent residence through marriage to what United States citizen? The baby was adopted by what United States citizen? The baby’s spouse acquired permanent residence through marriage to what United States citizen?

     People who lived in the United States since adoption as a baby can be deported a hundred years after your faulty petition.

     We need a statute of limitations. One year is plenty of time to learn that you caused a fatal hit-and-run crash en route to the citizenship ceremony. After one year, the naturalization would become final, and the Fourteenth Amendment’s citizenship clause would apply.

Shut down the U.S. Border Patrol, Immigration and Customs Enforcement and Customs and Border Protection

     We all agree that governments have no right to restrict immigration. Let’s not hesitate to assert such an obvious truth. This land ain’t your land. This land ain’t my land. If you own your house and yard, it is not mine.

     We are all children of the same God. Your birthplace does not make you superior or inferior to anybody else.

     If somebody brings in a truckload of cocaine, you don’t have to buy any.

     The idiots vote for candidates who are in favor of public school, and when school taxes go up, they tell local bureaucrats to impose tougher zoning restrictions, and they tell Congress to add more Border Patrol goons. Public school has to go, but that is another matter.

     Breweries ship beer by the truckload from one State to another, and there is no need to search the truck at the State boundary. Everything has to be reported, and they get audited.

Full implementation of the metric system

     The U.S. Constitution, Article I § 8 gives Congress the power to “fix the standard of weights and measures;” In 1866, they passed a federal law making it legal for folks to use the metric system, but States still impose speed limits in miles, and force grocers to post unit prices per pound. The instructions for the Naturalization petition, Form N-400, says to write your height in feet and inches, and clearly says not to use metric units.

     The problem is that so many members of Congress are pandering to the morons who are proud that they don’t know the metric system. It’s time to get the morons off our backs. It’s time to secure the blessings of the metric system to ourselves and our posterity.

Tom Alciere addresses Tulsi Gabbard, one of the Democrats running for President, in Manchester, New Hampshire 30 November 2019

Tom Alciere addresses Andrew Yang, one of the Democrats running for President, in Nashua, New Hampshire on 1 January 2020. <sarcasm>Alciere should be working for Project Vote Smart, the way he phrases the question without the slightest hint of bias.</sarcasm>

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